Epiphany

As I was preparing for my Halloween Party, I received my Pink Polar FT4 from Jenny Hodges is Metamorfit in the mail.  I decided to base this years Halloween Costume on my watch.  I made this plan to dress up as an injured marathon runner.  It seemed appropriate since any attempt I could make at running a marathon would be an absolute disaster.  I created my Marathon Tag to depict this perfectly.  I had band aids, an ace bandage, and make up all ready to complete the injured look.  I had fabric for a sling.  This was going to look awesome. 

Then I had an epiphany.  The reason I was so excited about winning that watch was because of what it represented.  It represents all of the hard work I have done so far, and the path I have ahead.  This watch will help me as I exercise to calculate every burned calorie, and target the correct heart rate.  This watch will help me achieve greater goals in my workouts.  Not to mention it is beautiful pink!  I could not disgrace myself by making fun of the old me.  The coach potato me.  The me that would never run in a marathon or to the end of the street for that matter.  (I was also nervous that my prone-toworry nieces may start worrying that their mother would get injured if she continued to run in marathons).  So I concocted a new plan.  A plan that involved the new me.  The person I want to be.

I am not promising that I will be competing in the Portland Half Marathon in 2015, but the point is, I could.  I can keep bettering myself and moving forward.  Who cares what I was.  This is who I want to be.  The woman that can decide to train and run in a marathon.

Secretly I have always been envious of runners.  The way they fly through the air.  I have never been a runner much less flown through anything but a meal.  I guess you could say it is on my Bucket List.  I have always put down runners saying how stupid they are to be so hard on their joints and knees especially.  I would say walking is so much better for you.  Hysterically I did neither walking or running.  But making running seem dumb helped me be okay that I am not good at running or physical activity on any major scale.  Things are changing.  Anything is possible.

This doesn't have to mean anything to anyone but me.  I tried to explain my excitement about my epiphany to Beau, and he said that I was acting a little crazy and was kind of scary. lol.  I probably was.  But this was the first time I really thought that the world was my oyster.  Now, I am far from being ready to run in a marathon, but I will make it there.  Last week someone asked me what I would say if someone told me it would take me three years to lose the weight.  I smiled inside because I knew the answer.  It is something I have seen on Pinterest, but have taken to heart.

 

So what if it takes a long time.  I am going to get there.  Today is another weigh in, and I am excited (and nervous - lets be honest) for the opportunity to see how this week has turned out.  I am working hard.  I am really starting to see a little extra space in my clothes (which are still a little more snug then I would prefer), but improvement is improvement. 

I wanted to share our scary masterpieces from our Halloween Party.  Mine is in the middle.  I haven't carved a pumpkin in at least 10 years, but I had so much fun!  I got elbow deep in nasty pumpkiny gook and created a work of art - kind of.