You know it is always funny to me to see the media try to tell us how to live, and what is and is not acceptable. I read a blog yesterday that ridiculed woman who were married and had children as they are giving up on their potential to leave a legacy. It is crap. What it means to be a feminist, and what it means to not be a feminist. I like to consider my thoughts progressive. I do not like the idea that there is only one way to be. So I am going to go on a rant. These opinions may not be popular, but they are mine. I do not ask you to agree, simply to respect my opinions as I will respect yours. You can stop reading here if you want. I won't be offended.
Growing up I was surrounded by influences that taught me that the only way a woman could fulfill her life's purpose was to get married and become a mother. While I admit that I have accomplished the first part of this, I desire to fulfill the second. I want to be a mom. But I am much more than that. I saw so many shining examples of accomplished woman who fulfilled the medias expectation of "doing something with their life" while being a mom. I believe that being a stay at home mom is not a waste just as working outside of the home is not a waste. I think many people consider those who chose to stay at home and raise their children as throwing away the towel and not living up to their potential. This is just not the case. Can you honestly tell me that a mother raising her children to enter society and be upstanding contributing citizens is a waste? Now this may mean that woman is not discovering the cure for cancer, but I would argue that there is only a small percentage of people in this world capable of such a feat. What if that woman is raising a child that will find a cure to major disease or illness? What if she is raising a child who will grow up to be the president of the United States, or another influential politician. What if she isn't. What if her kids will grow to be no more than an average citizen. I think we discredit how important each member of our community is. We all play a part in contributing to those around us. Why do we belittle and demean the significance of each person?
What about the women that work and have families? I don't believe there is a cookie cutter one size fits all way of living. Some families have stay at home dads. Some mothers are single parents doing everything they can to provide for their children. Maybe that means that her children have to go to daycare. So what? I have seen many wonderful mothers who work outside of the home. They raise good children who become good people. In fact, I would go so far as to say that I admire those women. Not only do they have the responsibilities of child rearing (whether they share this responsibility with their spouse or not) and they also go to work to help provide. I don't think whether this is an optional choice or necessity changes whether or not a woman is a good mother.
I haven't mentioned all of the circumstances that women find themselves in. There are so many. My main point it that I think I am a feminist. In my own right. I believe that a woman can be a mother, wife, employee, employer, and any combination in between and still be living up to her potential. I don't think it is anyone else's business why someone has "chosen" to live one way or another. It isn't "our" business. A woman should be able to chose what works best for her and her family.
I was once standing in a room of several woman looking at our current situations. I mentioned that I feel judged because I had been married for several years and do not have children. Another said she felt judged because she had her children too close together, and another felt judged that she had too much space between her children. One had too many children, and one not enough. One is judged for working, and reversely another judged for not working. I hope you get my drift.
When I think of feminism and women's rights I think that these are important because we should have every opportunity in life that will help us be successful. I am not talking about hand outs. We should work hard for what we need. A man and a woman should have that equal opportunity. That being said I also think we should realize the there are anatomical and physiological differences between men and women which make our abilities different. Instead of complaining about these "limitations" I think we should embrace them. I love that my body is different than a mans. These differences are what allows my body the opportunity to create life. These differences also prevent me from growing a beard and a mustache. Thank heavens! Not to mention chest hair! I think that we should celebrate our differences and embrace our common abilities. Women are not held back from working, voting, owning property, etc. There are still areas where woman will hopefully gain equality. It takes time. We will get there. But denying our anatomy and screaming feminism is not going to change anything.
End Rant.
MyFitnessPal
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
I did it!
Yesterday was a great day for me at Weight Watchers. I celebrated my 16 week anniversary of going to meetings as well as losing my 10%, and I haven't missed one week since I started. In that 16 weeks I have lost 42.6 pounds, reached both my 5% and 10% goals, conquered fears and changed habits, and have gained a lot of personal insight. I was pretty excited about my progress. Ironically we discussed celebrating victories that do not involve the scale. I sat in my chair and smiled to myself. I have so much to celebrate, but don't worry I won't bore you with the details because I talk about a lot of the milestones I have experienced so far. The big thing to me was realizing that I have conquered the unconquerable number. I have lost more than 50 pounds. In fact, in total I have lost 58. That is the most weight I have ever lost at one time. I'm not done either. There is no giving up going on here. I am energized and ready to keep going.
What I love about WW is the community. The people that build me and inspire me. There are so many people in so many different situations. We all have completely different lives, but have one thing in common: we want to be healthy. That is pretty awesome. Each one of us experience different hurdles along our journey and struggle through different set backs. But we all understand what the successes and the failures mean to each other. I really am glad that I made the decision to go back to WW for my long term weight loss goals.
There is a chair at my in-laws that I typically avoid. It is a beautiful dining chair with arm rests. Before I wouldn't sit in it because I didn't fit. My wide hips just barely allowed me to sit on the edge of my seat. Last week it was the only chair available in the living room, so I sat on the end. Then I realized that I could sit further back. Then I realized I could rest my back on the back of the seat. I fit. I smiled inside, and then found myself sitting in it and the other one just like it several more times. I don't know if it was that I couldn't believe it, or I was just so darn proud of myself!
I did succeed at removing the carpet from the car. I had help, but I helped too. I didn't run away or allow someone else to do it all for me. I pitched in and got dirty. We are still working to get the carpet dry, but we are headed in the right direction. The smell seems to be alleviated from the interior of the car which makes me a very happy person. I just have to make sure the smell is gone from the carpet and padding, and then I will restore the carpeting in the car. Until then my ride is a little louder!
I really do feel truly blessed in my life. I may be living in someone else's home, and I may not be down to my desired weight, but I am blessed. I am learning so much about myself in this journey. Each day is an opportunity to smile and be proud of my accomplishments. I know that I couldn't do this without the support I have. My support is amazing!
What I love about WW is the community. The people that build me and inspire me. There are so many people in so many different situations. We all have completely different lives, but have one thing in common: we want to be healthy. That is pretty awesome. Each one of us experience different hurdles along our journey and struggle through different set backs. But we all understand what the successes and the failures mean to each other. I really am glad that I made the decision to go back to WW for my long term weight loss goals.
There is a chair at my in-laws that I typically avoid. It is a beautiful dining chair with arm rests. Before I wouldn't sit in it because I didn't fit. My wide hips just barely allowed me to sit on the edge of my seat. Last week it was the only chair available in the living room, so I sat on the end. Then I realized that I could sit further back. Then I realized I could rest my back on the back of the seat. I fit. I smiled inside, and then found myself sitting in it and the other one just like it several more times. I don't know if it was that I couldn't believe it, or I was just so darn proud of myself!
I did succeed at removing the carpet from the car. I had help, but I helped too. I didn't run away or allow someone else to do it all for me. I pitched in and got dirty. We are still working to get the carpet dry, but we are headed in the right direction. The smell seems to be alleviated from the interior of the car which makes me a very happy person. I just have to make sure the smell is gone from the carpet and padding, and then I will restore the carpeting in the car. Until then my ride is a little louder!
I really do feel truly blessed in my life. I may be living in someone else's home, and I may not be down to my desired weight, but I am blessed. I am learning so much about myself in this journey. Each day is an opportunity to smile and be proud of my accomplishments. I know that I couldn't do this without the support I have. My support is amazing!
Friday, January 24, 2014
Rise Up
I am not really sure what to write about today. I feel like a post is in order, but I don't have anything mind blowing or even partially entertaining to report. I lost 2.8 pounds this last week, so I have recovered from my weight gain last week.
Over the weekend I detailed our "new to me" car. There has been an unpleasant smell in it since we purchased it, and I have been waiting until we were moved out of our old place before tackling the project. Beau helped me take all of the seats out, and I spent several hours Saturday scrubbing and cleaning the carpet to rid the smell from the car. After those several hours, back and neck pain, and a carpal tunnel flair up the smell remains. I wanted to cry. I decided that I am going to need to take the carpet out and replace the padding, and that should alleviate the problem (after additional scrubbing on the carpet). Back when I started my journey I never would have considered taking on this kind of project. My body would complain and struggle too much with the task. There is still a part of me that wonders if I am up to the task. The task involves removing all the seats (again) as well as removing the center console and other trim pieces to free the carpet. I have never attempted something like this before. I got to thinking about it, and I realized that since I got married I have not really tried these kind of projects because Beau can and is much better than me at them. I have released my independence and allowed myself to become dependent. Now I don't think that this is necessarily a bad thing in all cases as we are married, and it is good to rely on each other. But I need to be able to stand on my own two feet and feel proud of who I am. If I am constantly allowing Beau to do things for me I am denying myself. So this weekend I will tackle the scary task of working on my car...again.
I think my approach to the car situation really sums up a lot of my life - especially the last several years. I have taken a back seat approach. I was merely surviving through the daily tasks I was faced with. I was easily defeated, and gave in without a fight when I did not "seem" equal to the task. Why did I give up? Why was I so weak? I could write it off and say it was because of the weight, or other unfortunate aspects of my life. I don't really think that is the answer though. I gave up. I didn't think I was. I called it surviving. It was not survival it was throwing in the towel. I made excuses that satisfied my conscious and let go of the things that make me who I am. I wasted a lot of time feeling sorry for myself.
I am afraid of failure. This fear has allowed me to cower and hide when tasks seemed even the slightest bit beyond me. I would rather never try then try and fail. Well that is the old me. I can try and fail, or I can try and succeed. Is it really worth giving up the chance of success just because there is also a chance of failure? I think of little babies as they learn to walk. They are unsteady on their feet and often fall down. Yet they get back up and try again. In the scriptures we are told to be as little children. I think that applies to more than just faith. Little children are not afraid to fall down, or to make a mistake. They pick themselves back up, brush of the dirt, and try a new path. What is the worst thing that could happen if I fail? Possibly I might embarrass myself. But is everyone else so perfect that they don't fail in one way or another? I also feel like I can't start something unless I have all of my ducks in row first. That is another misconception.
So starting today, right now in this moment, I am going to stop being so scared to stumble and enjoy the successes with the failures. I am going to put myself in situations that I would typically avoid. I am going to become the woman that I want to be, not the one I think everyone else expects me to be based on my size, shape, education, gender, religion, family, etc. I am going to be true to the woman inside of me. I am going to rise up and become the person I am meant to be.
Over the weekend I detailed our "new to me" car. There has been an unpleasant smell in it since we purchased it, and I have been waiting until we were moved out of our old place before tackling the project. Beau helped me take all of the seats out, and I spent several hours Saturday scrubbing and cleaning the carpet to rid the smell from the car. After those several hours, back and neck pain, and a carpal tunnel flair up the smell remains. I wanted to cry. I decided that I am going to need to take the carpet out and replace the padding, and that should alleviate the problem (after additional scrubbing on the carpet). Back when I started my journey I never would have considered taking on this kind of project. My body would complain and struggle too much with the task. There is still a part of me that wonders if I am up to the task. The task involves removing all the seats (again) as well as removing the center console and other trim pieces to free the carpet. I have never attempted something like this before. I got to thinking about it, and I realized that since I got married I have not really tried these kind of projects because Beau can and is much better than me at them. I have released my independence and allowed myself to become dependent. Now I don't think that this is necessarily a bad thing in all cases as we are married, and it is good to rely on each other. But I need to be able to stand on my own two feet and feel proud of who I am. If I am constantly allowing Beau to do things for me I am denying myself. So this weekend I will tackle the scary task of working on my car...again.
I think my approach to the car situation really sums up a lot of my life - especially the last several years. I have taken a back seat approach. I was merely surviving through the daily tasks I was faced with. I was easily defeated, and gave in without a fight when I did not "seem" equal to the task. Why did I give up? Why was I so weak? I could write it off and say it was because of the weight, or other unfortunate aspects of my life. I don't really think that is the answer though. I gave up. I didn't think I was. I called it surviving. It was not survival it was throwing in the towel. I made excuses that satisfied my conscious and let go of the things that make me who I am. I wasted a lot of time feeling sorry for myself.
I am afraid of failure. This fear has allowed me to cower and hide when tasks seemed even the slightest bit beyond me. I would rather never try then try and fail. Well that is the old me. I can try and fail, or I can try and succeed. Is it really worth giving up the chance of success just because there is also a chance of failure? I think of little babies as they learn to walk. They are unsteady on their feet and often fall down. Yet they get back up and try again. In the scriptures we are told to be as little children. I think that applies to more than just faith. Little children are not afraid to fall down, or to make a mistake. They pick themselves back up, brush of the dirt, and try a new path. What is the worst thing that could happen if I fail? Possibly I might embarrass myself. But is everyone else so perfect that they don't fail in one way or another? I also feel like I can't start something unless I have all of my ducks in row first. That is another misconception.
So starting today, right now in this moment, I am going to stop being so scared to stumble and enjoy the successes with the failures. I am going to put myself in situations that I would typically avoid. I am going to become the woman that I want to be, not the one I think everyone else expects me to be based on my size, shape, education, gender, religion, family, etc. I am going to be true to the woman inside of me. I am going to rise up and become the person I am meant to be.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Toilet Paper, Acupuncture, and Weight Gain
What do these three things have in common? I am going to write about them - that's what!
Back last July I measured myself to see exactly where I was in regards to measurement not just weight. I was half heartedly startling a cleanse and hoping that by some miracle that just putting forth the smallest amount of effort I would see drastic results. Shockingly I did not. Well I lost that piece of paper, and when I was packing last week it turned up again. I had hid it so no one could find it (apparently including myself). I realized that back in July I weighed 2 more pounds than I did in September, and I retook my measurements to discover I have lost 16 inches. I thought this was a very small number considering the fact that I have lost 50 pounds. I was discouraged. Then I thought about toilet paper. When you pull out a brand new roll of toilet paper it seems to not get smaller for a long time. The size of the squares are equal, yet the rate in which the toilet papers circumference decreases is not. That small square does not make as big of a difference when the roll is full compared to when the roll is almost empty. I compared this to my body. I am a large person, so the pounds coming off will not have as dramatic an effect in the beginning as they will down the road. I do not need to despair. Although strange and a bit septic, this analogy helped me come to terms with another aspect of my journey. Ah, peace is restored once again.
Yesterday I went in for my very first ever acupuncture appointment. I was really excited until about lunch when the realization sunk in and I became nervous. What was I thinking? I drove over to the doctor's office, and put my big girl panties on and found some courage. I have several things that acupuncture can help with (apparently), but my main concern is my neck and back pain. I feel like the limitations it places on my life are no longer acceptable. As the acupuncturist walked me through the procedure I was calmed and reassured. I came out feeling a bit sore (apparently it works your muscles), but a lot less tense. I could feel a huge difference in my muscles that way. Also, I was really not excited about needles being placed all over my body. The needles are so small that if I felt anything it would be a small pinch that would quickly go away. So, I will be going back next week for another appointment. I am not 100% sold yet, but I am not deterred so I will keep going for now.
Now for the accountability moment. I gained weight. Last week I ate according to plan, but was not as careful about eating my fruits and veggies and complex carbs. I feel this impacted my weight gain, but not to the degree that I gained. For the last couple of months (only on Mondays) I have started to starve and dehydrate myself in preparation of my weigh in. This resulted in a very unhappy me, and as I thought more about this decision I realized that I cannot live every week this way. It makes Monday dreadful, and I really need my weigh ins to be a positive experience. So I gathered my strength and accepted the weight gain potential and drank all the water I wanted, and I had a very satisfying lunch. When I stepped on the scale and saw the 2.4 pound increase I was only slightly disappointed. I actually felt really proud of myself for allowing this positive change in my routine. Since this is a life change I need it to be sustainable. Next week I will be able to continue eating and drinking my water and will not have to worry about the effect on my weight loss because I already took the hit. Monday night Beau and I went out to dinner and I indulged on chips and salsa. I tracked everything when I was done, and felt really happy that I had allowed myself the indulgence and lived through it. Yesterday was business as usual, and I feel more energized to keep going.
We moved over the weekend. It was not fun! Things were looking fairly bleak until the youth in my church showed up with their families and went to work. Not only did they get my house packed, but they also helped me clean. I have never accepted help to clean a home during a move, but I have never been so grateful for service in my life. There is one last load of a couple odds and ends that will be retrieved today, and then the move-out will be complete. We still have the move-in to our new place to worry about, but it is not ready yet, so in the meantime we will be staying with Beau's parents. I am so grateful for their generosity in letting us stay here as we wait for our place. I don't know what we would do without them!
So that is what is going on. Nothing too exciting here, but life is good. I feel truly blessed to have good friends and family who love and support us .
Back last July I measured myself to see exactly where I was in regards to measurement not just weight. I was half heartedly startling a cleanse and hoping that by some miracle that just putting forth the smallest amount of effort I would see drastic results. Shockingly I did not. Well I lost that piece of paper, and when I was packing last week it turned up again. I had hid it so no one could find it (apparently including myself). I realized that back in July I weighed 2 more pounds than I did in September, and I retook my measurements to discover I have lost 16 inches. I thought this was a very small number considering the fact that I have lost 50 pounds. I was discouraged. Then I thought about toilet paper. When you pull out a brand new roll of toilet paper it seems to not get smaller for a long time. The size of the squares are equal, yet the rate in which the toilet papers circumference decreases is not. That small square does not make as big of a difference when the roll is full compared to when the roll is almost empty. I compared this to my body. I am a large person, so the pounds coming off will not have as dramatic an effect in the beginning as they will down the road. I do not need to despair. Although strange and a bit septic, this analogy helped me come to terms with another aspect of my journey. Ah, peace is restored once again.
Yesterday I went in for my very first ever acupuncture appointment. I was really excited until about lunch when the realization sunk in and I became nervous. What was I thinking? I drove over to the doctor's office, and put my big girl panties on and found some courage. I have several things that acupuncture can help with (apparently), but my main concern is my neck and back pain. I feel like the limitations it places on my life are no longer acceptable. As the acupuncturist walked me through the procedure I was calmed and reassured. I came out feeling a bit sore (apparently it works your muscles), but a lot less tense. I could feel a huge difference in my muscles that way. Also, I was really not excited about needles being placed all over my body. The needles are so small that if I felt anything it would be a small pinch that would quickly go away. So, I will be going back next week for another appointment. I am not 100% sold yet, but I am not deterred so I will keep going for now.
Now for the accountability moment. I gained weight. Last week I ate according to plan, but was not as careful about eating my fruits and veggies and complex carbs. I feel this impacted my weight gain, but not to the degree that I gained. For the last couple of months (only on Mondays) I have started to starve and dehydrate myself in preparation of my weigh in. This resulted in a very unhappy me, and as I thought more about this decision I realized that I cannot live every week this way. It makes Monday dreadful, and I really need my weigh ins to be a positive experience. So I gathered my strength and accepted the weight gain potential and drank all the water I wanted, and I had a very satisfying lunch. When I stepped on the scale and saw the 2.4 pound increase I was only slightly disappointed. I actually felt really proud of myself for allowing this positive change in my routine. Since this is a life change I need it to be sustainable. Next week I will be able to continue eating and drinking my water and will not have to worry about the effect on my weight loss because I already took the hit. Monday night Beau and I went out to dinner and I indulged on chips and salsa. I tracked everything when I was done, and felt really happy that I had allowed myself the indulgence and lived through it. Yesterday was business as usual, and I feel more energized to keep going.
We moved over the weekend. It was not fun! Things were looking fairly bleak until the youth in my church showed up with their families and went to work. Not only did they get my house packed, but they also helped me clean. I have never accepted help to clean a home during a move, but I have never been so grateful for service in my life. There is one last load of a couple odds and ends that will be retrieved today, and then the move-out will be complete. We still have the move-in to our new place to worry about, but it is not ready yet, so in the meantime we will be staying with Beau's parents. I am so grateful for their generosity in letting us stay here as we wait for our place. I don't know what we would do without them!
So that is what is going on. Nothing too exciting here, but life is good. I feel truly blessed to have good friends and family who love and support us .
Friday, January 10, 2014
Moving Stinks
So this week has been all about moving. I am proud to say the worst of it is packed, except the kitchen. I will be attacking that this evening since people from our church will be here in the morning to move us. I am excited for the end result of the move (living in a larger 3 bedroom house with gas appliances, lots of storage, shorter commutes and carpet), however, the packing up and getting things there is not fun.at, all. In some ways it kind of feels like Christmas seeing things that I don't look at all that often. That is probably a sign we could live without it, but I am not ready to part with most of it yet.
I did not make any freezer meals, and have not purchased groceries (except for Beau's precious Coca Cola and a few oranges) in a few weeks in an attempt to decrease the volume of food we will be moving. It has worked well except for the fact that I have eaten rice every day for a week now. I told Beau I am not cooking tonight and I am looking forward to something else to eat! I have cooked every day which is something I am extremely proud of since I have never been that good during a move before. Not only has it saved us money, but it has also helped me make sure I am eating good food.
We will be living with Beau's parents until our house is ready for us. We are hoping that it will be just for a few weeks (we don't want to outstay our welcome). In the mean time I have continued to pin ideas for our new place. I am really inspired by all the cool things people have done to decorate their homes. There are some really awesome DIYers out there!
I started a biggest loser challenge with some coworkers. We all put $20 in and the person who loses the highest percentage of their weight at the end wins. I am not sure why I decided to do this challenge. I know that I have to lose more weight to hit those percentage points, but I thought that losing weight with others might be a good motivation over the next couple of months. I am not changing what I am doing, but I am staying the course.
I did not make any freezer meals, and have not purchased groceries (except for Beau's precious Coca Cola and a few oranges) in a few weeks in an attempt to decrease the volume of food we will be moving. It has worked well except for the fact that I have eaten rice every day for a week now. I told Beau I am not cooking tonight and I am looking forward to something else to eat! I have cooked every day which is something I am extremely proud of since I have never been that good during a move before. Not only has it saved us money, but it has also helped me make sure I am eating good food.
We will be living with Beau's parents until our house is ready for us. We are hoping that it will be just for a few weeks (we don't want to outstay our welcome). In the mean time I have continued to pin ideas for our new place. I am really inspired by all the cool things people have done to decorate their homes. There are some really awesome DIYers out there!
I started a biggest loser challenge with some coworkers. We all put $20 in and the person who loses the highest percentage of their weight at the end wins. I am not sure why I decided to do this challenge. I know that I have to lose more weight to hit those percentage points, but I thought that losing weight with others might be a good motivation over the next couple of months. I am not changing what I am doing, but I am staying the course.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Resolute
I always laugh a little when the new year comes around and I consider making a New Year's Resolution. Part of me finds the idea ridiculous because you create a plan on the first and by the 5th or 6th of January all focus is typically wavering or completely gone. I think my favorite New Year's Resolution to date was one that someone shared with me several years ago. The resolution was to never make another resolution - ever again. He has successfully kept his resolution, as far as I know. I decided to really look at what it means to be resolute. To be resolute means to be firmly resolved or determined; set in purpose or opinion. I think that the power of this word really sunk in when I looked at the list of synonyms and "undaunted" was one of the listed words. I think over time the beauty of this opportunity has been lost as we make resolutions with the idea that it is okay if we fail or fall short. Why go to the trouble of trying to change if you aren't really going to put forth the effort? So as I considered my resolution for 2014 I considered my accomplishments for 2013. Last January if you would have told me that in September I would make a change that would have resulted in close to 50 pound (48.4 to be exact) weight loss by the end of the year, I would have probably laughed in your face. But I did it. I lost weight - a lot of weight. Yes there is still much to go, but I have a strong start and as I approach 2014 I am going to make a SMART resolution.
Specifically (S) I am going to continue going to Weight Watchers meetings and eating according to plan. I am going to aim for a weight loss that averages 2 pounds per week (M). I will achieve (A) this by staying on track and adding in additional healthy lifestyle components as necessary. I will focus on 20 pound increments (R) and take each day meal by meal and when necessary moment by moment. Losing weight takes time (T) especially since I am making a lifetime change. It is okay if I still have a ways to go - the changes I am making now will benefit me for the rest of my life (which is going to be a lot longer than the amount of time it will take for me to lose the weight).
The last week has been another internal struggle to stay on track. I wanted to eat. a. lot! A friend at my WW meeting told me the next time I am tempted to put the wrong thing in my mouth I just need to picture all of my friends at WW and remember to keep on track. I kind of chuckle a little at the idea of picturing them as I reach for a cookie or piece of candy. I still lost weight this last week. I am down another .8 pounds which was one of my greatest weight losses to date. The reason is because I didn't quit. I wanted to throw my hands up in the air so many times and just indulge - endlessly. I continued to write down everything that entered my mouth and did not go over my daily intake goals. I told my WW meeting leader that I keep psyching myself out over this amount of weight loss because of losing focus at this point before. She shared this letter she had all about letting things go. Let our preconceived notions of what is go and let us make goals and determine who we are now. I am the worst person at letting things go. I am a dweller. I dwell on every little step out of place I take, and I dwell on the steps almost taken out of place (you know the ones that I think about, but don't actually act on). I need to let things go. I need to get over it. I used to love a quote about time.
I don't need to look backwards or even forwards all the time. I just need to focus on the now and appreciate the moment that is here. I think it is so easy in our lives of work and family and friends to forget the now. I am a planner and I am always looking at if I do this now, then this should happen and tomorrow I can be happy. When I was younger (teens I think) I remember listening to Oprah (my mom had it on while she prepared dinner during the week) as she was speaking to different guests about living today. One of the guests was a woman who was single and had a really special bottle of wine she had been saving for years. She wanted to drink it at the best moment possible. Oprah (and maybe Dr. Phil lol) told her to drink the wine. That there was much to celebrate in her life even if it hadn't turned out the way she had planned she was still doing great things and she was still worth it. Now I am not going to tell you to go drink some wine, but I think the lesson is still there. Yesterday I ran across this on Pinterest, and I think it says my thoughts perfectly.
Every day is special and important. Every day is a reason to celebrate.
A couple of weeks ago we purchased a "new to me" Pontiac Aztek. This car was a repossession and was not taken care of very well on the inside. I was looking online for some seat covers. I did a search for "Pontiac Aztek seat" and up came lots of results for seat covers as well as seat belt extensions. I smiled because I don't need one. I fit in the Aztek. I know that in September that wouldn't have been the case, but it is now. I purchased a zip-up hoodie at a family reunion in 2012. At the time the hoodie would hardly zip up, but I tried it on yesterday and it fits better now than when I bought it. Last night I decided that I wanted to experiment with my new enamel cast iron cookware and made chicken cooked in salsa and rice for dinner. Beau had made a pizza, and I sat there thinking I was having a much better meal than him. I never thought I would be able to think that a healthy meal was better than pizza. These little things are all reasons to celebrate.
Welcome 2014! I am ready to enjoy your ups and downs. I approach the lessons I will learn with excitement and hope. Every day will not be a walk in the park, but every day will be a special occasion to recognize how truly blessed I am.
Specifically (S) I am going to continue going to Weight Watchers meetings and eating according to plan. I am going to aim for a weight loss that averages 2 pounds per week (M). I will achieve (A) this by staying on track and adding in additional healthy lifestyle components as necessary. I will focus on 20 pound increments (R) and take each day meal by meal and when necessary moment by moment. Losing weight takes time (T) especially since I am making a lifetime change. It is okay if I still have a ways to go - the changes I am making now will benefit me for the rest of my life (which is going to be a lot longer than the amount of time it will take for me to lose the weight).
The last week has been another internal struggle to stay on track. I wanted to eat. a. lot! A friend at my WW meeting told me the next time I am tempted to put the wrong thing in my mouth I just need to picture all of my friends at WW and remember to keep on track. I kind of chuckle a little at the idea of picturing them as I reach for a cookie or piece of candy. I still lost weight this last week. I am down another .8 pounds which was one of my greatest weight losses to date. The reason is because I didn't quit. I wanted to throw my hands up in the air so many times and just indulge - endlessly. I continued to write down everything that entered my mouth and did not go over my daily intake goals. I told my WW meeting leader that I keep psyching myself out over this amount of weight loss because of losing focus at this point before. She shared this letter she had all about letting things go. Let our preconceived notions of what is go and let us make goals and determine who we are now. I am the worst person at letting things go. I am a dweller. I dwell on every little step out of place I take, and I dwell on the steps almost taken out of place (you know the ones that I think about, but don't actually act on). I need to let things go. I need to get over it. I used to love a quote about time.
I don't need to look backwards or even forwards all the time. I just need to focus on the now and appreciate the moment that is here. I think it is so easy in our lives of work and family and friends to forget the now. I am a planner and I am always looking at if I do this now, then this should happen and tomorrow I can be happy. When I was younger (teens I think) I remember listening to Oprah (my mom had it on while she prepared dinner during the week) as she was speaking to different guests about living today. One of the guests was a woman who was single and had a really special bottle of wine she had been saving for years. She wanted to drink it at the best moment possible. Oprah (and maybe Dr. Phil lol) told her to drink the wine. That there was much to celebrate in her life even if it hadn't turned out the way she had planned she was still doing great things and she was still worth it. Now I am not going to tell you to go drink some wine, but I think the lesson is still there. Yesterday I ran across this on Pinterest, and I think it says my thoughts perfectly.
Every day is special and important. Every day is a reason to celebrate.
A couple of weeks ago we purchased a "new to me" Pontiac Aztek. This car was a repossession and was not taken care of very well on the inside. I was looking online for some seat covers. I did a search for "Pontiac Aztek seat" and up came lots of results for seat covers as well as seat belt extensions. I smiled because I don't need one. I fit in the Aztek. I know that in September that wouldn't have been the case, but it is now. I purchased a zip-up hoodie at a family reunion in 2012. At the time the hoodie would hardly zip up, but I tried it on yesterday and it fits better now than when I bought it. Last night I decided that I wanted to experiment with my new enamel cast iron cookware and made chicken cooked in salsa and rice for dinner. Beau had made a pizza, and I sat there thinking I was having a much better meal than him. I never thought I would be able to think that a healthy meal was better than pizza. These little things are all reasons to celebrate.
Welcome 2014! I am ready to enjoy your ups and downs. I approach the lessons I will learn with excitement and hope. Every day will not be a walk in the park, but every day will be a special occasion to recognize how truly blessed I am.
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